Midjourney/prompt: “show someone on a lounge chair at the beach, but they're working on their laptop”

True Leisure and the Tyranny of Total Work

Don’t define your life by a to-do list you can never finish

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The famous Robert Frost poem—about taking the road less traveled—hits differently at my age. In my mid-thirties, I find myself wondering whether Frost had to grieve the loss of the road he didn’t take—not because he made the wrong choice, but simply because he had to make a choice at all.

When I was younger, I thought I had time for everything. Even if I knew logically that I wouldn’t, the perspective of my youth didn’t contain the true weight of mortality. Now I know better. We don’t have time to do it all.

Although it’s one of the most fundamental problems of human existence, it’s natural to fear death and try to distract ourselves from thinking about it. There’s no shortage of tools to help redirect our attention. In my coaching practice, I’ve found that one of the most insidious drugs of choice is also one of the more socially acceptable ones: work.

Work is productive. Work puts food on the table. Work is virtuous. While societal narratives recognize that compulsive working is unhealthy—hence the term “workaholism”—your relationship to work has to deteriorate to quite an extent before such protective mechanisms kick in. The culture encourages and rewards unhealthy attitudes towards work.

Let’s dive deeper into how people use work to avoid facing mortality, society reinforces that avoidance, and the structure of modern-day work creates a bind that can be difficult to escape.

What happens when leisure ceases to exist?

The combination of the fear of finitude and perception of work as virtuous gives rise to a phenomenon called total work, which was coined by German philosopher Josef Pieper. Total work is a state of being where work is the central and defining focus of life. Put another way, total work is what happens when leisure ceases to exist. 

According to Pieper, leisure is the capacity to “just be” without the need for distraction. Consider what happens when you have nothing in particular to occupy your attention. Often, it’s in these moments that you find challenging feelings becoming more salient in your awareness. This is the loop that keeps driving so many of us back to distraction.

In his 1948 book Leisure: The Basis of Culture, Pieper says, “Against the exclusiveness of the paradigm of work as activity, first of all there is leisure as ‘non-activity’—an inner absence of preoccupation, a calm, an ability to let things go, to be quiet.” 

What Piepier is pointing to is the fact that leisure is not a break from work, because to decide to take time off from work is to assert that life is defined by work. In the same way as a weekend is defined in relation to the week, vacations and similar things that may look like leisure are in fact defined in relation to work.

Here are some other things that aren’t leisure. Leisure is not studying in order to be better at work. Leisure is not meditation performed in order to be more relaxed and effective at work. Leisure is not exercising in order to be more energized for work. And leisure certainly isn’t a “power nap” between meetings.

Leisure is the absence of the concept of work altogether. Leisure is what happens in the spaces where you’re neither “actively working” nor “not actively working.” And as work becomes more total, leisure becomes more difficult to access. This is a problem, because not only is leisure where all of the rest of your life happens, away from work; it also provides the spaciousness necessary to surface things that really matter.

You may be inclined to avoid the spaciousness of leisure, because it can bring up feelings you don’t want to be with, like that fear of finitude—of one day having to leave the party of experience before the end. As Pascal puts it: “All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” And when unable to sit quietly in a room alone, many of us choose to work instead, and then we tell each other that this is just fine, actually.

The thing is, those fears and preoccupations aren’t going away, and those unexamined fears will be waiting patiently for you at the end. Why not turn and face them earlier? Socrates told us that “the unexamined life is not worth living.” Well, to be able to examine your life in such a way that it is worth living requires the spaciousness of leisure.

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Comments

@mike_8038 almost 2 years ago

Wow, the idea of using work to avoid facing mortality is thought-provoking for me. This is interesting: "that fear of finitude—of one day having to leave the party of experience before the end."

@stan.jaxn almost 2 years ago

"take time to grieve the loss of the roads not taken"-beautifully put

Carl Baker almost 2 years ago

I just retired and going from workaholic to doing things that have intrinsic worth to me rather than things that are important to faceless organizations is a transition. This provided some much-needed clues to going forward.